Filling The Void

[MajestyJo]

"We review our past performance and our present behavior to see what we want to keep and what we want to discard."

Basic Text, p. 29

As each day winds to a close, many of us reflect on the past twenty-four hours and consider how we can live differently in the future. It's easy for our thoughts to remain trapped in the mundane: change the oil in the car, keep the living room clean, or empty the litter box. Sometimes it takes a special effort to jog our thinking out of the daily rut and onto a higher track.

One simple question can put us on the high road: What do we think our Higher Power wants for us tomorrow? Maybe we need to improve our flagging conscious contact with the God of our understanding. Perhaps we've been uncomfortable in our job or our relationship, holding on only out of fear. We might be hiding some troubling defect of character, afraid to share it with our sponsor. The question is, in what parts of our lives do we really want to grow?

As each day ends, we find it beneficial to take some moments to spend time with our Higher Power. We can begin to reflect on wht will benefit our program of spiritual growth most in the coming day. What more fitting way to end the day?

Just for today: I will set aside some time at the end of the day to commune with my Higher Power. I will review the past day, meditating on what stands between me and my Higher Power's will for my life.

This is a NA Just for Today reading, and yet a drug is a drug. It has been my experience, that when I find myself disconnected, overwhelmed, I can slip into another addiction, even if I didn't use my drug of choice.

It has been made obvious by my son, when he doesn't have his pot and beer, he uses food. He just doesn't graze, he obliterates everything in site. There is just no ONE in thought and actions, and like a true addict, some is good, more is better. As he says, "Who ever heard of anyone saving it for tomorrow?"

One chip, one cookie, one lottery ticket, one article of clothes was never enough, and the same with my computer, having 15 sites was an addiction, that I had to turn over to my God.

I quit smoking because I wanted to be a clean, clear channel to help others, how can I suggest something, when I am not willing to give it up myself. I had to change my attitude, no more something or nothing at all.

Going for that extra plateful of food, when I am not hungry. I am just stuffing feelings or situations that I don't want to address. It doesn't have to be food, it can be my books, my bed, my TV, etc. When I have a void, I need to fill it up with spiritual things, meetings, talking to my sponsor, going to recovery sites, reading recovery and spiritual readings.