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12-04-2024, 05:17 AM | #14 |
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December 14
Daily Reflections REACHING OUT Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 95 When I come into contact with a newcomer, do I have a tendency to look at him from my perceived angle of success in A.A.? Do I compare him with the large number of acquaintances I have made in the Fellowship? Do I point out to him in a magisterial way the voice of A.A.? What is my real attitude toward him? I must examine myself whenever I meet a newcomer to make sure that I am carrying the message with simplicity, humility and generosity. The one who still suffers from the terrible disease of alcoholism must find in me a friend who will allow him to get to know the A.A. way, because I had such a friend when I arrived in A.A. Today it is my turn to hold out my hand, with love, to my sister or brother alcoholic, and to show her or him the way to happiness. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of A.A. is the way of service. Without that, it would not work. We have been "on the wagon" and hated it. We have taken the pledge and waited for the time to be up with impatience. We have tried in all manner of ways to help ourselves. But not until we begin to help other people do we get full relief. It is an axiom that the A.A. program has to be given away in order to be kept. A river flows into the Dead Sea and stops. A river flows into a clear pool and flows out again. We get and then we give. If we do not give, we do not keep. Have I given up all ideas of holding A.A. for myself alone? Meditation For The Day Try to see the life of the spirit as a calm place, shut away from the turmoil of the world. Think of your spiritual home as a place full of peace, serenity, and contentment. Go to this quiet, meditative place for the strength to carry you through today's duties and problems. Keep coming back here for refreshment when you are weary of the hubbub of the outside world. From this quietness and communion comes our strength. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may keep this resting place where I can commune with God. I pray that I may find refreshment in meditation on the Eternal. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It After the "Honeymoon", p. 216 "For most of us, the first years of A.A. are something like a honeymoon. There is a new and potent reason to stay alive, joyful activity aplenty. For a time, we are diverted from the main life problems. That is all to the good. "But when the honeymoon has worn off, we are obliged to take our lumps, like other people. This is where the testing starts. Maybe the group has pushed us onto the side lines. Maybe difficulties have intensified at home, or in the world outside. Then the old behavior patterns reappear. How well we recognize and deal with them reveals the extent of our progress." ******************************** The wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong. 1. Letter, 1954 2. 12 & 12, p. 88 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The best of the Past Living today. We're told that we should forget the past when we come into AA. Since we can't change it, we should not waste time and energy reliving it. Let's be careful, however, not to take this advice too literally. There was much in our past that was good, even when we were drinking. We have a right and a need to treasure these important things. The real dangers of living in the past come either from brooding about its mistakes or from thinking that our best days are already behind us. We can think of the past as a foundation for the good we expect today and in all the days ahead. I'll preserve the best in my memories of the past, knowing that these helped bring me to my present state of recovery. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is broken winged bird that cannot fly. --Langston Hughes Many of our dreams died as our addiction got worse. We felt the loss but couldn't speak it. With recovery, we regain our ability to dream. Dreams of sharing our lives with family and friends return. They push out thoughts of getting high. Dreams of pride and self-respect reappear. They replace the awful feeling of shame. Like the quote above says, "Hold fast to dreams...." Our dreams are our wishes for the future. They hold a picture of who we want to be. In our dreams, we let our spirits soar. Often, we fell close to God, others and ourselves. Thanks God, we can dream again. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks to you, my wings have been mended. Guide me as I fly. Action for the Day: Today, I'll take time out to dream and share my dream with those I love. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever. The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle. I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY To Christ I conceded the certainty of a great man, not to closely followed by those who claimed Him. His moral teaching--most excellent. For myself, I had adopted those parts which seemed convenient and not too difficult; the rest I disregarded. p. 11 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" Behind the facade, my real life seemed just out of reach. I wanted to consider myself grown up, but inside I felt small and helpless, hardly there at all. I would look at my friends--delightful, interesting, good people--and try to define myself through them. If they saw something in me that made them want to be with me, I must have something to offer. But their love for me was not a substitute for loving myself; it didn't fill the emptiness. p. 339 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." If temperamentally we are on the depressive side, we are apt to be swamped with guilt and self-loathing. We wallow in this messy bog, often getting a misshapen and painful pleasure out of it. As we morbidly pursue this melancholy activity, we may sink to such a point of despair that nothing but oblivion looks possible as a solution. Here, of course, we have lost all perspective, and therefore all genuine humility. For this is pride in reverse. This is not a moral inventory at all; it is the very process by which the depressive has so often been led to the bottle and extinction. p. 45 ************************************************** ********* In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. --Dereke Bruce "Life is short, and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind." --Henri Frederic Amiel "The human spirit rings with hope at the sound of an encouraging word. --unknown "Many a good man has failed because he had his wishbone where his backbone should have been." --Unknown The first step identifies the problem, the remaining eleven steps are the solution. The first tradition identifies the problem, the remaining eleven traditions are how we do that. --unknown "Every situation can be a positive situation if you look upon it as an opportunity for growth and self-improvement." --Brian Tracy "Step into a new you each day. Reach out to greater health, happiness, fitness, friendship, love and greater pride in yourself." --Mark Victor Hansen Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour. Life didn't end when I got sober -- it started. H E A L = Helping Every Alcoholic Live. Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GOD "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me." -- Jesus (Matthew 27:46) In my sickness I was often angry at God. Angry that He did not do what I wanted Him to do when I wanted Him to do it. I was a spoiled child. I refused to understand that suffering could be an important part of my spiritual growth. Today I know this to be true. The biggest part of my suffering, then and today, is the feeling of isolation. Not knowing for certain that He hears me. Not understanding completely what His will is for me. Not getting clear answers to my daily confusion. The doubt is part of the faith. The "not knowing" is the answer. Lord, may the daily doubts lead to a creative faith. ************************************************** ********* "All things work together for good to them that love God." Romans 8:28 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 "Seek the LORD and live." Amos 5:6a ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Laughter is a speedy way to bring people together, build friendships and reduce stresses. Lord, help me participate in the many opportunities to feel the calming effect of laughter. It is good to know where you are, but better to know where you are going. Lord, may I use every day to grow closer to You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Addiction, Drugs, And Recovery "Addiction is a physical, mental, and spiritual disease that affects every area of our lives." Basic Text pg. 20 Before we started using, most of us had a stereotype, a mental image of what addicts were supposed to look like. Some of us pictured a junkie robbing convenience markets for drug money. Others imagined a paranoid recluse peering at life from behind perpetually drawn drapes and locked doors. As long as we didn't fit any of the stereotypes, we thought, we couldn't be addicts. As our using progressed, we discarded those misconceptions about addiction, only to come up with another: the idea that addiction was about drugs. We may have thought addiction meant a physical habit, believing any drug that didn't produce physical habituation was not "addictive." Or we thought the drugs we took were causing all our problems. We thought that merely getting rid of the drugs would restore sanity to our lives. One of the most important lessons we learn in Narcotics Anonymous is that addiction is much more than the drugs we used. Addiction is a part of us; it's an illness that involves every area of our lives, with or without drugs. We can see its effects on our thoughts, our feelings, and our behavior, even after we stop using. Because of this, we need a solution that works to repair every area of our lives: the Twelve Steps. Just for today: Addiction is not a simple disease, but it has a simple solution. Today, I will live in that solution: the Twelve Steps of recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons. --Ann Ruth Schabacker Today will be filled with surprises, big ones and small ones, like the gifts at a birthday party. Maybe we'll see a friend we haven't seen for a while. Or we'll find something we thought was lost. Whatever happens today will be special, and is meant to help us grow in just the right way. Growing up doesn't always feel easy. We're expected to be more responsible and thoughtful of others. We're expected to be honest about our feelings and needs. If we're angry or scared, we need to tell someone. Sharing our secret about being afraid relieves us of the fear, and we feel lighter, happier, like after opening a special gift. When I receive today's gifts, will I stop to appreciate them? You are reading from the book Touchstones. No matter how old you get, if you can keep the desire to be creative, you're keeping the man-child alive. --John Cassavetes Creation is the work of God. It is not given to most of us to be famous artists. But the spiritual experience of being creative is open to us when we take on a creative attitude toward what we are doing. We might do this on the job when we determine to do more than just get the job done. We may decide to have fun while we do what needs to be done, or we may decide to put our best spirit into the work before us. Some men find creativity in working with wood, others in coaching sports with children, someone else in cooking, and another in community service. Being creative moves us toward wholeness as people. As we create on the outside, we are being created on the inside. The way in which we live every aspect of our lives is a creative, growing process and a partnership with God. As I approach this day, I will have an attitude of creativity that will nurture the wondering child within me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever. The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle. I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Clear Thinking Strive for clear thinking. Many of us have had our thinking clouded by denial. Some of us have even lost faith in ourselves because we've spent a degree of time in denial. But losing faith in our thinking isn't going to help us. What we need to lose faith in is denial. We didn't resort to denial - either of someone else's problem or our own - because we were deficient. Denial, the shock absorber for the soul, protects us until we are equipped to cope with reality. Clear thinking and recovery don't mean we will never resort to denial. Denial is the first step toward acceptance, and for most of our life, we will be striving to accept something. Clear thinking means we don't allow ourselves to become immersed in negativity or unrealistic expectations. We stay connected to other recovering people. We go to our meetings, where peace of mind and realistic support are available. We work the Steps, pray, and meditate. We keep our thinking on track by asking our Higher Power to help us think clearly - not by expecting Him, or someone else, to do our thinking for us. Today, I will strive for balanced, clear thought in all areas of my life. Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Open Your Heart to Universal Love We live in a magical, living, vital, and personal universe, a world where universal love is real. We don’t just live in it, we’re part of it, visibly and tangibly connected to it. The phone call that comes at the right time. A book that teaches us what we need to know. A movie that has the message we need to guide us and open our hearts. An opportunity that arises, at just the right moment. An idea triggered by something someone says or an object we didn’t notice before. The more we open to universal love, the more it will be there for us, embracing, loving, holding, guiding us. The more we learn to see it, the more it will be there– until we wonder why we never saw it before. Open your heart to universal love. It’s more than merely there. It’s there for you. Jump into the arms of a living, magical world and you leap into the arms of universal love. See how real it can be. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go You’re not a survivor anymore Many years ago, I asked a fellow therapist what the one thing was that hallmarked the unhappy state of being many of us have come to label as codependency. “It’s the Karpman Drama Triangle,” he said. “People rescue someone by doing something they don’t want to do, or it’s not their business to do. Then they get angry and persecute the person. Then they walk away, feeling like a victim. Again.” A light when on in that moment. Like a gerbil on a wheel, I could see myself spinning around this triangle. I was regularly rescuing somebody, then getting angry, and ultimately feeling victimized by it all. I was creating the pain and the drama in my life. Over the years, I stopped rescuing alcoholics. Many of us have gotten off that painful wheel. We know we can’t control another person’s chemical dependency, depression, problems, or life. But we may have stepped off that wheel and gotten ourselves into another more subtle drama spin. A friend recently cleaned our his entire house– closets, garage, drawers. He had to hire a truck to come and take everything away. “I can’t believe everything I collected and hung onto,” he said. “Most of it was junk that I didn’t want in the first place. I guess that came from being poor and going without for so long. I convinced myself that if it was free or cheap, I’d better grab it and take it home.” Many of us were survivors at one time. We either genuinely didn’t have a choice or convinced ourselves we didn’t. So we clung to whoever and whatever came along our path. You may have survived what you went through, but you’re not a survivor anymore. There is no need to desperately cling to whatever comes along. You’re living now. You’re living fully and freely. Choose what you want. God, help me give myself permission to walk a path with heart. *************************************** People in Need Taking Our Turn to Give by Madisyn Taylor The greatest gift we can give to somebody in need is giving awareness and without judgment. When we see a person in need, we may want to give them something as a way of helping them, but if we give without taking the time to see who they really are, honoring that most of all, our gift is nowhere near as powerful as it could be. We may want to give a homeless person a sandwich, for example, but if we give it without also taking a moment to look the person in the eye, making authentic contact, we rob them of the experience of being human. Being in a position of need leaves a lot of people feeling vulnerable and full of self-doubt. The greatest gift we can give is to meet people in need without judgment and with the awareness that we are not superior to them simply because we are not currently in their position. If we take the long view, we can see that we all began life in need of a lot of care and attention, and many of us end life in the same way. Giving and receiving are companion energies that take turns throughout our lives, and we all get a chance to be on both sides of the exchange from time to time. It’s important to be aware of our own tendency to give from a desire to feel good about ourselves, rather than from an acknowledgement of our connection to all people. Letting go of our self-importance allows us to see that, regardless of appearances, we are all givers and receivers. When we are in the position of the giver, we honor those we are helping when we remember the many people who have helped us. Then we can look the person we are helping in the eye, aware that we are making contact with a human being who is our equal. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Some of us in The Program are inclined to make the mistake of thinking that the few moments we spend in prayer and meditation — in “talking to God” — are all that count. The truth is that the attitude we maintain throughou7t the entire day is just as important. If we place ourselves in God’s hands in the morning, and throughout the day hold ourselves ready to accept His will as it is made known through the events of our daily life, our attitude of acceptance becomes a constant prayer. Can I try to cultivate an attitude of total acceptance each day? Today I Pray May I maintain contact with my Higher Power all through my day, not just check in for a prayer now and then. May my communion with God never become merely a casual aside. May I come to know that every time I do something that is in accord with God’s will I am living a prayer. Today I Will Remember Prayer is an attitude. *************************************** One More Day I am just a heartbeat away from loneliness. – Laura Palmer The holiday season can be difficult for anyone who has had a major life change. A person who has been widowed, has moved, or has had to deal with new physical limitations may become lonesome when each holiday, birthday, or anniversary rolls around. We sometimes cause ourselves pain by isolating ourselves. We may feel that no one wants to share the holiday with us or that we don’t wish to impose the inconvenience of illness upodn friends. By reminding ourselves of the meaning of these special days, we often find that we can move out of our isolation. Holidays and other occasions reaffirm the value of tradition, love, and family. These days compel us to remember our place within a welcoming circle of friends and family. I can choose to reach out during the holidays — or any day. ************************************ Food For Thought Open Hands If our hands are tightly clenched, we cannot receive anything with them. In order to benefit from the OA program, we have to let go of whatever we are hanging on to, open ourselves to the program, and be willing to receive. We open our hands to the hands extended in fellowship by our new friends. We open our minds and hearts to new ideas, new truth, and new feelings. We cannot receive the new way of life if we are closed and unwilling to change. Much of what we hear at meetings may sound strange in the beginning, but if we are receptive, it gradually makes sense. There is nothing about this program, which is impossible for any one of us. All that is required is the desire to stop eating compulsively and the willingness to learn how. If we are having trouble with abstinence, it may be because we are hanging on to old ways and have closed our hands, refusing to take certain parts of the program. Our Higher Power extends to us the tools of recovery through the OA program. All we have to do is open our hands, firmly grasp these tools, and use them. I open my hands to receive Your gifts. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~CHANGE~ To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable. Helen Keller As far back as I can remember, I have always been fearful of change. I preferred to stay in my comfort zone, even when it became uncomfortable or painful. I suppose that was why I stayed in the disease for so long; it was what I knew. It was safe and predictable and I didn't have to deal with painful emotions such as loss and rejection. This was also why I stayed so long in a bad marriage; I was terrified of what was outside the walls of my dysfunctional relationship. In truth, I didn't really live, because fear of change prevented me from forming new relationships and doing new and exciting things. Even the move from one city to another was totally traumatic, because the old and familiar was what I knew, not because it was better. Even then, I spent so long looking at the closed door behind me that I failed to see the open door in front of me. I know now that even when I fear change, I need only put one foot in front of the other, and do what is before me. Because I now have faith that my Higher Power will be with me every step of the way, I need only ask for help, and the help comes. Even though it still is not easy, I am aware of how many changes I have been able to make with the help of my Higher Power. In the past, I spent so much time obsessing about the outcome that I talked myself out of the change I was thinking of making. The biggest change that has happened for me is my newfound faith which enables me to take that leap into the unknown. There have been other miraculous changes too. Now I have a more open and honest relationship with my children and others because I am able to take more risks and set boundaries, which I had never been able to do before. I have changed careers, undertaken flying overseas on my own, and in general am not the scared person I used to be. I also have a whole new family of wonderful friends in this fellowship who understand me and love me always. One Day at a Time . . . I continue to grow and change as God wills me to do, and I will not be afraid because I know that He will always be there to guide and help me. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that. - Pgs. 14-15 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We can never get enough of what we really do not want. We don't really want drugs, we want what we hope they'll bring us, wholeness, satisfaction, escape from pain. God, as I understand You, let me see what I really want. Spirit Calls Spirit calls to me within and without. In a still, small voice I sense spirit whispering in my inner ear. My body feels an increasing sense of aliveness as I invite spirit to make itself known to me. I do not even need to make room for spirit, because spirit breathes in each pore within me. It fills the numbness with energy. It fills the emptiness and causes my cup to overflow with its presence. There are gifts in listening if I am willing to sense, hear and see them, lessons I can learn. Little hints that help me to appreciate what I already have and open myself to experiencing more. I will look for evidence of spirit at work in my life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There is no completion for the circle of recovery. A circle has no beginning and no end. It is suggested that recovery begins when you have learned enough from those before you and pass it along to those behind. Love is the process that keeps the circle moving. Standing hand in hand or arm in arm after a meeting I absorb the love that travels our circle of recovery. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book To the desolate alcoholic, the act of kindness can be the difference between getting 'better' or getting 'bitter.' Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Using will power to control drinking is about as effective as using will power on diarrhea. - Steve M.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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