One Bite Means A Binge

[MajestyJo]

One Bite Means a Binge

By this time; we know that we do not overeat moderately. One extra compulsive bite sooner or later becomes a binge. Keeping this fact firmly planted in our consciousness prevents us from deluding ourselves into disaster. For us, there is abstinence or there is chaos. Nothing in between.

Deliver me from the bite that means a binge.

Food for Thought

The reading today looks like I should put it in other addictions, but it reminds me that the substance is but a symptom of my disease and the problem is me.

Whether it is the bottom of a cookie bag, a bag of chips, the bottom of a bowl/carton of ice cream, one is too many and a thousand is never enough.

The substance can't hurt me until such a time as I choose to injest it in whatever form it takes. It all leads to jails, institution and death.

Many people come into recovery and put on a lot of weight or get caught up in busy so they don't have to look at themselves. They figure that it is healthier than their drug of choice not realizing that they are setting themselves up for strokes, heart attaches, cancer and other medical problems.

Many doctor's do not know much about addiction. They give people anti-depressants and other medications which put on weight and people relapse to get thin. They don't like themselves and when they put on the the extra weight, smoke more cigarettes, drink more coffee, they don't realize that they are continuing to do things that are hazardous to their health. I knew I was an alcoholic. I didn't care. Fear couldn't scare me into not drinking. Fear doesn't stop me from using.

I often got into dysfunctional relationships because I wasn't feeling good about myself and looked to someone else to make me feel better.

Then there is the problem of the thinking behind the using. Well I look fat so what is the use! Not eating and not taking medications as prescribed and playing doctor with my life, is just as abusive as taking too many. I can't play doctor with my life and with that of others.

I can remember taking that Zyban pill, and sitting there waiting for the fix to come and asking myself, "I took a pill, why do I still have a craving?" The solution is a spiritual one. I need to fill up with goodness not more of the same. Letting go of old thoughts and behaviours and choosing to no longer live in the I and remember that we can do what I can't do alone.



I had the thought also that sometimes action is "No action" and just because I get the thought of using, doesn't mean I have to following the thought up. Also, just because I have a feeling, doesn't mean I have to act on it. That is what I did wrong for years, act, react! I can stop, hesitate and meditate before I verbalize or take the next right step.