Drugs vs Alcohol

[MajestyJo]

It says in the NA literature, "Alcohol is a drug."

When they say it at the meeting, they say it out loud and say,
"Alcohol is a drug period" to emphasize the fact, but it is their own denial and their own unwillingness to quit.

My son says he will never give up pot not matter what. He may come of crack/cocaine, but never pot and beer and if he gave up the beer, he would not stop the pot.

So many people forget that they started their journey by having a beer and when it stopped working or didn't work fast enough they went on to other stuff. Others would use beer to come down off of their drug of choice, so it is an association and it takes them back out time and again. So many times I hear, well I am not using my drug of choice. Whooped-de-doo! You are still using.

To top it all off, the drug is but a symptom of the disease. The disease is the thinking behind it, no matter what you use. I had to take my thinking behind my drug to my God, no matter what it was, whether it was my pills, alcohol, my last relationship that ended up with me going to sexual assault counselling, food, my computer, my sites, and as Father Peter W. says, "Anything that you put between you and who your God wants you to be in today, becomes your drug and your god. He became a priest in recovery and has over 50 years of sobriety.

http://www.thespec.com/news/local/ar...50-years-sober

There was a lot of controversy when he put this in the paper.

[MajestyJo]

When I first noticed it was in early recovery and I was at my friends and she had made stew. It was something that was only so, so when I made it. It was eatable, but I never considered all that great. This day at her place, I was reaching for the third bowl of it, I thought, "Whoa! This is good, you really are not all that fond of stew, and you are not hungry, why are you reaching for more?" Plus I was eating bread along with the stew.



The better example was with my cigarettes, like standing in the middle of my living room floor with my legs crossed lighting my cigarette so I could go to the bathroom. I feel hungry, it isn't time to eat yet, so I will have a cigarette. I feel hungry, but I just ate not too long ago, don't want to eat again. I am hungry, but Kevin isn't due home for another hour, I'll wait for him, I'll have a cigarette. I am really angry, why is he taking so long, and I light another cigarette. Oh when did I light that one? Oh well, another one wasted. He said he would be right home, it doesn't take this long, "puff" "puff" and I am not going to do this again, "puff" "puff" and he hadn't better not give me a hard time when he gets home, "puff" puff" and....

Cigarettes more than any other substance stuffed more feelings for me and when I quit them in 1998, I had been using them for 39 years. They were the hardest things to quit until I used the NA program. Instead of substituting food, I used the spiritual food of NA to fill me up. I lost 3 lbs. instead of gaining 30 lbs.

Just for today, I choose not to use.

[MajestyJo]

Quote:

A drug, broadly speaking, is any chemical substance that, when absorbed into the body of a living organism, alters normal bodily function.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drug



Sometimes when my son comes by I can tell he has been using or I know he is coming down from what ever substance he has been on. When he was drinking, I could smell it. When he was drinking he staggered and had trouble walking (just like my ex-husband). When I drank I could walk that straight line and was a functioning alcoholic. I never saw myself as a 'drunk,' and many people told me they had never seen me drunk and questioned that I was an alcoholic.

I find it scarey not knowing although he has admitted to using cocaine, I am not sure if it has progressed to crack although he has admitted to trying it and not liking it. There is so much out there, so much to experiment with, that I fear although I would be surprised if he started using anything with a needle. That is something he has been terrified of all his life. We all know that fear never stopped an addict from doing anything, so it could end up there.

He had three months clean and sober. He knows there is a better way. It is his choice. I see him flipping from channel to channel when he comes here and if there is any mention of drugs, addiction and getting help, he changes the channel. He just isn't ready. I can't forget that he has his own Higher Power and I am not it.

The link refers to coffee and cigarettes. I gave up coffee because they went with the cigarettes. Yesterday for the first time I went to the mall after the chiropractors while waiting for the bus home and bought a black coffee and added sweetener (Stevia). I don't like the taste but drank it any way. I stopped drinking coffee completely when I learned I was diabetic because I liked double sugar. The same old adage, some is good, more is better. It was a loving relationship that I had with coffee (2-3 pots a day) and coffee (1-2 packs a day). As my friend says, "I only have 3 cigarettes a day, but heaven help you if you take those away."



A drug is a drug.
From my site Star Choices

[MajestyJo]

Quote:

I don't like that term "drug of choice." They use that in treatment centers a lot I noticed. In the program I understand that a drug is any substance that is mind altering , mood altering, or lets me not feel, run from myself because I may not like who I am , or even know who I am. A 'drug' changes us in many neurological ways..for many of us who started early on, like me, I never really "grew up" ..I may be 48 but left myself back at the early 20's..I just ran and ran, from one substance to another..there really was no "drug of choice" ..like you said it was just more of! A drug for me is not just alcohol and drugs, but also food, relationships, playing victim, cigarettes, coffee and other caffeine drinks-though due to my bi polar, I am not to use these to the extent I once did. Well , any substance that makes us not feel, that numbs us emotionally, and blocks us spiritually. I have been to several NA meetings where they said Alcohol is a drug! Hey, a drug is a drug..no matter what it is, when I use it to get relief from something, like boredom, anxiety, fear all that good stuff it is being used as a drug for me. Good topic, thanks to all, Peace, Schell

This was shared by my friend who just posted on the site.

Tonight I was asking myself if I was stuffing my feeling tonight when I ate my Christmas dinner. I had turkey with jellied cranberries, stuffing, mashed garlic potatoes, mixed vegetables (peas, carrots, corn, yellow and green beans) and I made mushroom gravy. I didn't have salad because I didn't figure I had room to eat it all, a salad seems to fill me up when I eat it first. I didn't know I was going to eat THREE egg buns. I later had a bowl of caramel and fudge ice cream.

I have been upset with my son and his actions, I hardly spoke to him all day because I knew if I did, it would end up in a blow out of an argument. He was very aware of my feelings and he stayed in his room. It wasn't the happiest Christmas and have felt sad and hurt by his words and actions. One day at a time, it will pass. All I can do is pray and take care of myself. I normally eat about 2/3rd of what I had on my plate, without the buns. Food is just as much of a drug as alcohol and drugs. Relationships are just as much of a drug, especially when we can't see no and run away from an argument and saying the words we need to say. I now feel like I am on an emotional hangover.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today: I will set aside some time at the end of the day to commune with my Higher Power. I will review the past day, meditating on what stands between me and my Higher Power's will for my life.

pg. 145

It took me a long time to notice any change in my life. It was only after spending that time at the end of the day that I learned to see how I use to react and how I reacted in that day. Not only a daily inventory, but a growth inventory allowed me to see how the program was working for me.

Was generally the last to see it. Never noticed it unless it was pointed out by my sponsor and friends. I was a hard taskmaster and put high expectations on myself and didn't give myself much credit. I didn't want to take any, because as far as I was concerned it was my HP and the people in the rooms. I later learned to accept the fact that I put the work into it. I had to be willing to go to any length. I had to be willing to be willing, and when I didn`t have it, I had to surrender and pray for it, instead of trying to do things myself.