Recovery From Your Dis-Ease!

[MajestyJo]

~ The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions ~

I came to a meeting, all sad and alone,
So sick and tired, of the life I had known,

...Aching and dying, deep down inside,...
And feeling the pain, from the things i must hide.

They told me they loved me, and were glad I was there,
Who are these people, and why should they care?

But the more that I listened, the more I could see,
This room full of addicts, were just like me.

I started to share, trying hard not to cry,
and I no longer felt like I wanted to die.

I wanted to live, but hadn't a clue,
Of what to say, feel, or do.

These people were clean, and would show me the way,
So i listened some more, to what they had to say,

They spoke of a God, and "just for one day"
So I thought, "What the hell," and I started to pray.

They said "get a sponsor," and "keep coming back".
they said a program was all I did lack.

They said "Work the steps, or your going to die".
So I got me a sponsor and i started to try.

I shared with my sponsor who I had become,
The people I had hurt, the things I had done,

He told me he loved me, and then shared with me,
The things he had done, and who he used to be.

That's when i knew, and could finally see,
That if i worked the steps, that I too could be free.

Free from drugs, and feeling that way,
Free from obsession, just for today

So I listen to what you have to share,
Tell you I love You, let you know that i care,

Let you know I have found, a much better way,
Its working a program, we call N.A.

It's sharing my experience, strength, and hope as I trudge,
Its living a life, and not holding a grudge.

It's sharing with newcomers, as they wonder in,
And as they start to listen, they know they can win.

If we all really listen, to what's being said,
The thing's that they shared, the book that is read.

If we listen and learn, we will surely see,
How truly delightful recovery can be.

Anonymous

[MajestyJo]

HOW TO JEOPRODIZE YOUR RECOVERY:

ARGUMENTATIVENESS:
Arguing small, ridiculous points of view, looking for excuses to get angry.

CHEMICALS:
Using pills to ease tension.

thingyINESS:
Think you have it made, forgetting to guard against the things that lead to emotional problems.

COMPLACENCY:
Letting up on disciplines, getting lazy on recovery.

DEPRESSION:
Unreasonable despair, staying stuck, giving up.

DISHONESTY:
Little lies, deceits and making excuses.

EXHAUSTION:
Becoming overly tired, being a workaholic. If you don't feel well physically, your thinking is apt to deteriorate.

EXPECTING TOO MUCH FROM OTHERS:
Expecting others to follow your script and to change because you have changed.

FORGETTING GRATITUDE:
Forgetting how things have improved since you first started.

FRUSTRATION:
When things are not going your way.

IMPATIENCE:
Things are not happening fast enough, others not doing what you think they should do when you think they should do it.

SELF PITY:
Why do these things happen to me? Why do I have these problems?

SKIPPING THE BASICS:
Meetings, Fellowship, Meditation, Prayer, Personal Inventory.

OMNIPOTENCE:
Thinking you are all powerful, that you have everything under "CONTROL" ignoring suggestions and advice, having all the answers.

WANTING TOO MUCH:
Expecting recovery overnight, over-emphasizing the material things, concentrating on not having what you want rather than concentrating on wanting what you have.

[MajestyJo]

THINGS THAT CAN STAND IN THE WAY OF YOUR RECOVERY

D.E.N.I.A.L. - Don't Even Notice I Am Lying

Lips are moving, we're off and running.
Ever told a story, joke or lie so many times that even you believe it's true?

H.O.W. - Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness
This ones for you, Dad! Hope you like it.

S.L.I.P. - Sobriety Lost It's Priority / So Long, I'm Perfect
If you don't want to slip, stay out of slippery places!

B.I.B.L.E. - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth
Take it as you will.

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less.
My Way - No, My Way! - No My Way!

You're as sick as your secrets.
Most of the time, folks see it, know it, or feel it in some way or another, anyway. Get it?

S.O.B.E.R. - Son Of a !!!!!, Everything's Real
WOW! Life happens at the funniest times!

F.I.N.E.
[I'm] Frustrated, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional

F.E.A.R.
Face Everything And Recover

N.U.T.S.
Not Using The Steps

E.G.O.
Edging God Out

D.E.N.I.A.L.
Don't Even Notice I Am Lying

H.A.L.T.
[Don't get too] Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired

H.O.P.E.
Happy Our Program Exists

H.O.W.
Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness

G.O.D.
Good Orderly Direction

B.I.G. B.O.O.K.
Believing In God Beats Our Old Knowledge

S.L.I.P.
Sobriety Losing Its Priority

A.C.T.I.O.N.
Any Change To Improve Our Nature

P.R.O.G.R.A.M.
People Relying On God Relaying A Message

S.T.E.P.S.
Solutions To Every Problem Sober

K.I.S.S.
Keep It Simple, Sweetheart

Seven missed meetings makes one weak.

HALT: Don't get
too Hungry,
too Angry,
too Lonely, or
too Tired!!

If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got.
or
If you keep doin' what your doin'
you'll keep gettin' what your gettin'

A.B.C. - Acceptance, Belief, Change

A.C.T.I.O.N. - Any Change Toward Improving One’s Nature

E.G.O. - Edging God Out

F.A.I.L.U.R.E. - Fearful, Arrogant, Insecure, Lonely, Unsure, Resentful, Empty

F.E.A.R. - Face Everything & Recover /False Expectations Appearing Real

G.O.D. - Good Orderly Direction

H.A.L.T. - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired

H.E.L.P. - Hope, Encouragement, Love, Patience

T.I.M.E. - Things I Must Learn

Progress not perfection.

Change the things I can.

[MajestyJo]

AA slogans, sayings, and assorted inspirations

The steps keep us from suicide; the traditions keep us from homicide.

The only thing alcoholics do in moderation is the 12 steps!

The elevator is broken - take the steps!

Step 13: My life is unmanageable, and I want to share it with you.

It's alcohol-ism, not -wasm.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

Gossip hurts - and sometimes kills.

Pain is necessary, suffering is optional!

If nothing changes, nothing changes.

If you do what you always did, you'll get what you always got.

Some things have to be believed to be seen.

Feelings aren't facts!!!

In AA, first we remove the anesthesia, then we operate.

Fellowship is the meeting after the meeting.

Let us love you until you learn to love yourself.

Isolation is the dark room where we develop our 'negatives'.

Compare and despair.

Don't compare you insides to other people's outsides.

Let go or get dragged.

If your spinning your wheels, try getting out of the driver's seat.

If your a$$ falls off, pick it up, put it in a paper bag, and carry it to a meeting.

Remember the cost of your last drink or drug when observing the 7th tradition.

Take an action, then let go of the results.

Carry the message, not the mess.

Don't tease your disease.

It's the first car of a train that kills you, not the caboose.

Relapse is NOT a requirement.

Relapse begins long before you pick up the drink/drug.

If you hang around a barbershop long enough, eventually you'll get a haircut.

Those who matter, don't mind; those who mind, don't matter.

Expectations are preconceived resentments.

Serenity isn't freedom from the storm; it is peace within the storm.

Don't speak unless you can improve on silence.

You don't need to "find God"; He isn't lost.

Tell it to your sponsor, or you will be telling it to a bartender.

Surrendering means you don't have to fight any more.

Surrender Dorothy!

I didn't use drugs, drugs used me.

You can be just a crazy sober as you were drunk, you'll just remember it the next day.

AA Sayings - The Complete? List - "Easy Does It", "Keep it Simple Stupid", and many more.

SPONSOR: Sober Person Offering Newcomers Suggestions On Recovery

Original Source Unknown

[MajestyJo]

Trust the Process of Growth

Be patient with yourself. It takes time to work out issues, to work through things. It takes time to learn lessons. The more important the lesson, the longer the cycle to work it out and work it through.

We may live in a technical age, but our souls aren't technical. They're still connected to nature. We grow and change as nature does. Learn her ways. Study her seasons and cycles, and know those same seasons and cycles are in each of us. The process of change is like planting a seed and watching it grow and bloom into a flower.

What are you trying to develop? A project? A change in yourself? Is there something new you're learning, trying to do? Are you trying to adjust to a major change in your life? Is there an old habit you're struggling to let go of? A love relationship or friendship you're hoping to begin or attempting to end?

Each stage of the process of growth and change is important. From those first moments when we see the idea, or the change begins, to those long moments of nurturing and nourishing the idea, each stage counts. Is there a change in your life that's begun, one you've started to notice? Are you thinking about it a lot, talking about it a lot, but not quite ready to take action? That stage is important too. You're nurturing and nourishing the seeds of change.

It takes time for nature to change things into what they're becoming. It takes time for things to develop. Be patient with yourself and life. Trust the process of growth.

- Journey to the Heart

It was really important for me to trust the process. To know that things happen when they should. When I am ready, the teacher will appear, if I am open and willing to change.

As it says in the reading, that it doesn't happen over night. We didn't get this way overnight. We have a lot of fears and phobia to overcome. A lot of mixed messages to identify and accept or reject according to the person we want to be in today.

Trust that through my Higher Power I will know what is good for me. If I turn my day over, then I will get the Good Orderly Direction that I need daily. Divine Orderly Good will be there if I am willing to acknowledge it and apply it to my life.

Through trusting a Higher Power, I can learn to trust myself. To hear those Messages and know what is my God's will for me.

When I think of an abrasion on my body, I know that it has to heal inside and out. It has many layers, and often when it scabs over, I think it is okay and yet, if I were to take off the scab, I would recognize raw skin underneath. The same with us, many things have underlying issues that we need to deal with. It is seldom one thing, often compounded interest from something that goes way back, which we only recognize in today.

One day at a time, life doesn't get better, I do.

This was originally posted in 2011. It gives me comfort to go back and see that the words of yesterday, are still good in today. I am still doing, one day at a time.

[MajestyJo]

More to improve and fewer to disapprove
More doers and fewer talkers
More to say it can be done and fewer to say it's impossible
More to inspire others and fewer to throw cold water on them
More to get into the thick of things and fewer to sit on the side lines.
More to point out what's right and fewer to show what's wrong
More to light a candle and fewer the curse the darkness.

- Author Unknown

My drug of choice was more. I had to apply a new way of thinking and adjust my attitude about the word, I had to think recovery and living instead of addiction and an I don`t care, I`m not hurting anyone. Little did I realize, this disease affects more than me, it affects all those around me.

[MajestyJo]

Feel the truth In every moment, in every circumstance there is a new truth to be discovered. Life is rich with possibilities for deeper, more profound understanding.


You are, at the same time, all-encompassing essence and also a particular momentary expression of that essence. You live in this moment and you live beyond it.



Discovering truth is a matter of confirming in experience what you already know in your essence. The way you know it is truth is because it resonates so perfectly within the depth of who you are.



Truth is not something you must be told. Truth is truth because you recognize it so completely.



Living successfully in this moment and in this world is a matter of connecting your outer life to your inner truth. The most effective, fulfilling choice in any situation is to live the truth of who you are.



In pure truth there is no fear, no worry, no anxiety or anger. Feel the truth that is within you, and let it guide your every choice.



-- Ralph Marston

Just last night was sharing with someone about this. It is about finding our truth. Experiencing our own life and no longer living it through others.



For me, it is about not playing old tapes, but making new ones in living colour!



What do I believe in? What do I want for my life? What do I need for my own health and wel being so that I can be there for others? When I am focusing on others and not on my own recovery, the well runs dry. I need to remember that I need food for the body, mind and spirit.



Can't fault the last statement. If I am living in those feeling, I am not working my program or not working it to the best of my ability. When fear is near, God is here. I need to have faith in that. That is my truth.



There is negative in life. That is a given. It is what I can do to change it into a positive that matters. Turning a blind eye and pretending that it isn't there isn't the solution.


This was posted at Recovery Inn in 2010

In today, I see the disease through my son. He thinks I don't understand, because he used my drugs of choice and moved onto other things. He things because he uses other drugs, it makes him different. He doesn't want to admit the problem is him not me. It is not the substance, it is the dis-ease.

[MajestyJo]

What are your thoughts on "Behavioural Addictions", are they addictions, or bad habits that we enjoy?

A good question! My first thought was they were behaviors that developed as a result of my addiction(s). My love for attention, for validation and approval, my people pleasing, my looking for someone to love me and willing to go to any length to receive that love. A lot stemmed from my need to get comfort or a high and what I needed to do to attain it and maintain it.

Behaviours can be changed. Behaviours can be modified. Behaviours can no longer stand me in good stead and have to be revised to fit my life in today. Behaviours are often as a result of my action to others, which becomes my issue not theirs.

Again, when I see the control word, I think "if I have to control it, it is out of control." For me, the only way it can be controled is by surrendering it and asking my Higher Power for help. Control for me is an illusion. An example of this is me buying myself a treat. I tell myself I will have it a piece at a time. I have it a piece at a time but the problem is, it generally ends up being two pieces. As much as I give myself a talking to and tell myself I shouldn't eat it all at once or I shouldn't buy it at all, it ends up in my fridge. Until I find the willingness, to turn it completely over and ask my HP to take away the craving and the need, it isn't going to happen if I am truly honest with myself. I am telling tales on myself so perhaps, this will be the beginning of the first step on this matter.

I learn a long time ago, that I could be addicted to just about anything. One of the areas I had problems with were Nevada Tickets and Scratch Tickets. Here in my building, I see people who are completely out of control. They are excited about what they won, with no thought of how much it cost them to get it. How true that is with the rest of our life. I paid a high price for my recovery. In today, I choose not to spend any more than I can afford to lose. No matter what it is, I turn it over to my Higher Power and ask Him for help.

Something I posted in 2010

[MajestyJo]

How truly honest am I with myself? Is my drug of choice more? When I need to put it down, can I do so comfortably, or does it still call to me and do I listen? Do I say, just one more? Do I say, just one more won't hurt me? Do I say, "This isn't a street drug. I am not like one of those people!"

Do I tell myself, "I am not that bad yet! I am not like her. Heaven, forbid!"

What do you mean it all leads to the same soul sickness. So I buy a few scratch tickets, so I am just a little co-dependent, so I have a little eating disorder, so I work a few extra hours and I have an issue with being alone with me and fill my space up with other people. So I like video game, doesn't everyone. It is the in thing, everyone does it. So what if I get angry when the phone rings and interrupts my game. So what if I didn't return my friend's call, I can do it later.

So what I didn't make it to the meeting, it isn't the end of the world. There is always another one. I went to three meetings last week so it won't hurt for me to do only two this week. (That makes me cringe, I couldn't get by on less than 3 a week, generally it was no less than 5 after 10 years of recovery).

The list can go on an on, and I could probably come up with a whole lot more, but the whole idea is about my brain thinking more and my recovery starting to become less.

When I talked to people who relapsed, I asked them the cause of that relapse and they said, "I stopped going to meetings." I stopped calling my sponsor. I stopped working the steps. I did them once, I thought it was enough. When we work the steps, we heal and grow. Why not continue to heal and grow?

Sobriety! Soundness of mind! I have to work on my emotional sobriety daily. Picking up a drink or a drug is not an option, but working on my thinking, which was behind my drinking and drugging in the first place, is a daily exercise in sobriety.

[MajestyJo]

Widening the Circle

from: "The Three Legacies of Alcoholics Anonymous"

"For the first time we had begun to sense that the character of A.A. was changing. We were beginning to have success with milder alcoholics and even some potential alcoholics. In the first years, those of us who sobered up in A.A. had been grim and utterly hopeless cases, almost without exception. But now younger folks began to appear. Lots of people turned up who still had jobs and homes and health and even good social standing. These in their turn were able to persuade others like themselves of the need for A.A."

© 1957, Alcoholics Anonymous Comes of Age, page 199

The Hoffelds - Just For Today

THOUGHT FOR TODAY:

Being a little bit alcoholic is like being a little bit pregnant! I am grateful that others didn't have to go as far as I did before they sought help. I compared instead of identifying for years and stayed sick.

April 2004

Don't leave someone outside of the circle because they don't meet your criteria. In today's society, there are very few 'pure' alcoholics. Many addicts in today, started with wine in the home, as a teenager, having a beer with dad, and now with legalized pot, who knows where addictions will take us.

It isn't the substance, it is the thinking behind it that causes us to pick it up in the first place that is the issue. As I shared with my friend who I met up with today. I heard a recovering heroin addict, who never drank alcohol in her life because her father was an alcoholic, tell my story in the front of CA meeting room. I was there with an ex-boyfriend for an anniversary. I never did street drugs, they say "...and any mind altering substances," so that qualifies me. He was nodding and smiling, hearing my words coming out of her mouth, she had under a year clean when she was sharing her story (relapsed after 13 years clean) and I was clean and sober for 15 years clean and sober. It is one day at a time, just for today, I choose not to use.

It all leads to the same soul sickness, no matter what substance you use. It doesn't what name you label it with, be it heroin, crack, cocaine, men, food, alcohol, relationships, sex, gambling, prescription drugs, religion, work, pot, and as I use to say, "[img]Gravol[/img] was the candy I used when all the other things didn't work fast enough."

[MajestyJo]

Saw this picture. I wasn't too sure what they are suppose to be, but my first guess was glow worms. Well it use to take quite a lot for me to get a glow on and as my disease progressed, it took more and more to get me to that high I wanted to be at. I didn't think I could ever enjoy my life gain. Not being able to use was a real bummer, a real downer. Wrong, it was the beginning of a new way of life.

I am so reminded that I don't need drugs and alcohol to enjoy life. I can be me, I don't have to put on false fronts and masks, it is okay to just be me. Enjoy life, and take it one day at a time.

If we are not enjoying recovery, what are we doing wrong? Each year of recovery has been the best year of my life. I don't mean that life just turned around and became all rosy like these worms, not life didn't get better I did.

Some day, I didn't always live up to my expectations. Some days I didn't accomplish my goal for the day, but I learned that God just might have had other plans for me. So if things don't go my way, perhaps I should look to my God to see if He is trying to point me in another direction.

Holidays can be fun when sober. It is even more fun shared with another. Isolation is part of my disease, not a tool of recovery.

[MajestyJo]

When I looked in the books for all the "I" words: integrity, isolation, intimacy, independence, ignorance, intellectualizing, intention. None of us really thought of the "I" as for my own selfish-self-centeredness. Some did share on how they thought they knew everything and how they had focused on the alcoholic rather than on themselves.

It isn't about the alcoholic, recovery is about how I was affected by the disease of alcoholism.

Yet so much of our problems were living life "I" centered instead of God centered. I can identify with all of the "I" words, but what is important that I don't get back into the "I" can do this, "I" want that, "I think you should...."

When I think of all the issues "I"
needed to work on it was mind boggling.....

self-care
self-discipline
self-esteem
self-honesty
self-image
self-love
self-observation
self-respect

From a post in 2010

A good reminder of how we can get caught up in the great "I Am" especially when we look at others, in the program or at the "A" in our life, or at the "Earthinglings" we think should be in the program.

[MajestyJo]

The only difference between stumbling blocks
and stepping stones is how we use them.

Founds this link, an interesting and informative read.

http://positiveattitude.entireyellowpages.com/51586.php

[MajestyJo]

Sobriety - Soundness of Mind



SLIP - Sobriety Loses It's Priority.

When I thought of the topic, I thought of how we can slip
mentally, emotionally, and spiritually before we pick up.
Even those of us in Al-Anon and Nar-Anon can slip back into
old patterns and behaviors that are not conducive to good
recovery.

Through recovery, I've learned to depend upon my Higher Power!
Having said that, we can easily possess faith one day and struggle
with it the next. Fortunately, we don’t start our Al-Anon clock
over the way they do in AA. If we went back to Day 1 every time
we had a slip, being an old timer would mean I’d have about a
week in the program!

Co-Dependency means: I am a controller, a rescuer, a people
pleaser, an enabler, and a fixer... I am equally if not more sick
than my alcoholic and/or addict. Old reactions are hard to break,
and sometimes we slip back into old ways of thinking and
acting. It's in these times that we experience our slips, we
either move forward, or slips backward.....

SLIP: is Short Lapse in Program or Serenity Lost Its Priority.

The slogan, “First Things First” helps us to set reasonable
priorities and to keep a realistic perspective. This slogan helps
us to make choices we are comfortable with, and to act with
balance rather than react to crises. The serenity prayer is
my greatest tool for maintaining my peace and happiness....
It allows me time to cool off, before I make that slip!

When I accept everything as it is, I tend to be reasonably
serene. When I spend my time wishing things were different,
I know that serenity has lost its priority. CTC

When we hear the word sobriety, we associate it with AA and we miss out on one of the greatest gifts of recovery.