Daily Practice - January

[bluidkiti]

January 1

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 58-
Ch 5- How It Works:
RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

-Tom- “Rarely Have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.”
As my sponsor and I read that sentence, he stopped me and said, what do you think of that statement? I said, that was one of the boldest statements I had ever heard and it was was probably
bull ****. He said “well how about we do it and see what happens?” I said, “sure, whatever”.
The requirement in that sentence, if I do not want to fail in this business of sobriety is to “thoroughly followed Our Path” . That means I have to do what they did if I want what they have. Not my ideas and actions, but theirs.
The good thing for me was, I had nothing worthwhile to lose. If this didn’t work, I could always go get drunk.
I hear many alcoholics and addicts say, “I tried AA and it didn’t work” then I ask, “so you got a sponsor, went through the Steps out of the BB with your sponsor, 1 through 12?” Then they say “no, I just went to some meetings” then I say “oh, so you haven’t tried AA.”
I can ask myself, am I doing what AA is asking me to do or what I want to do?
If your answer is you are doing what AA is asking you to do, then Continue enjoying the results of those actions and your hard earned Sobriety.
If you are continuing to do what you want to do, then you will continue to get what you already had.
I pray that today I have the Courage to choose to thoroughly follow the Path AA has put in front of me.

[bluidkiti]

January 2

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 87-88-
Ch 6- Into Action:
(Pertaining to 11th Step)
As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day "Thy will be done." We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.
It works-it really does.
We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined.
But this is not all. There is action and more action. "Faith without works is dead." The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve.

-Tom- Many things stick out to me in those paragraphs. Where it says “we alcoholics are undisciplined” I am in line with the print there. The cool thing for me is that it doesn’t then say I need to be more disciplined, because If I could do that, I already would be, it says we “let” God discipline us in the simple way we just outlined.
The key word is “let”. AA and God does not force anything on us, we choose it, or not.
Only hostage takers make Demands. My God does not want mindless minions, He wants Powerful Freedom Fighters.
Power comes from Love, Freedom and Choice.
Today I pray that I am open minded enough to Let my God discipline and train me through the spiritual actions I take in the 12 Steps of AA.

[bluidkiti]

January 3

Practice of the day- BB pg 14-15-
Ch-1- Bills Story
“While I lay in the hospital the thought came that there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might be glad to have what had been so freely given me. Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn might work with others.
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then Faith would be dead indeed.
With us it is just like that.”

-Tom- The first 100 constantly bring up the Truth that sobriety is not free. “Through work and self-sacrifice for others” that’s not just work, that is hard work, difficult and takes up my time. And that is the Deal, I can take it or leave it, but I cannot change it.
I can ask myself “ am I working to enlarge my Spiritual Life in the way the Steps say to?”
If the answer is yes, then I continue. If the answer is no, then I need to call my sponsor and get to work.
I pray that for today I am given the Desire to enlarge my Spiritual Life and sacrifice my time for others, to the best of my ability.

[bluidkiti]

January 4

Practice of the day-
BB pg 164
Ch-A Vision For You:
Still you may say: “But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who write this book.” We cannot be sure. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. He will show you how to create the fellowship you crave.*
Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.

-Tom- at certain times in my Path of Sobriety, they were very lonely and the fear of not being able to stay sober long term hovered in the corners of my mind. I held the words in these paragraphs close to my Heart and Continued to Trudge and chose blind faith that they were true. Through TIME ;
T- things
I- I
M- must
E- earn
I experienced that every word was true. I have experienced great events for me and countless others, that brought me Joy. All I have to do is make sure my Relationship with My Higher Power is in order.
I can ask myself, “is my relationship Right between me and my Higher Power?” If the answer is yes, then I Continue.
If the answer is no, or I don’t know, then I need to stop, use my tools and my people in sobriety, and get it right as I can.
Then Continue, one day at a time.
I pray that today I remember that my job is to stay close to my Higher Power and perform His work well. He is responsible for the Outcomes

[bluidkiti]

January 5

Practice of the Day-
BB pg xxii-
Ch- Foreword To The Third Edition:
(March 1976)
The basic principles of the A.A. Program, it appears, hold good for individuals with many different lifestyles, just as the program has brought recovery to those of many different nationalities. The Twelve Steps that summarize the program may be called Los Doce Pasos in one country, les Douze Etapes in another, but they trace exactly the same path to recovery that was blazed by the earliest members of Alcoholics Anonymous.
In spite of the great increase in the size and the span of this Fellowship, at its core it remains simple and personal. Each day, somewhere in the world, recovery begins when one alcoholic talks with another alcoholic, sharing experience, strength and hope.

-Tom- all my life I wanted to be part of something Big, Powerful, Special, World changing, Purposeful and really made a difference in people’s lives. That is one of the reasons I loved the Military so much. Then the wreckage of my past and untreated alcoholism got in the way of that Desire.
Once I got sober and was living the 12 Steps, to the best of my ability, I found all of that in The Program and The Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. I chose that their primary purpose: to stay sober and help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety, was now also my purpose. With that in place, I knew where I was, where I was going and who I was going with. What a relief!
I have been to meetings and worked with alcoholics all over this planet: Mexico, Colombia, England, Ecuador, Germany, Iraq, Nicaragua, Australia and more. All my life I have looked for a place to fit in. Since I got sober I fit into many places but none of them compare to A.A.
Today I pray that I have the Strength to fulfill My primary purpose: to stay sober and help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety.

[bluidkiti]

January 6

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 16-
Ch 1, Bills Story:
An alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature. Our struggles with them are variously strenuous, comic, and tragic. One poor chap committed suicide in my home. He could not or would not see our way of life.
There is, however, a vast amount of fun about it all. I suppose some would be shocked at our seeming worldliness and levity. But just underneath there is deadly earnestness. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish.
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia. We have it with us right here and now. Each day my friend’s simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men.

-Tom- “an alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature”. For me, that is really churching it up. I was an absolute Monster. I brought to AA nothing but hate, anger, violence, aggressive attitude, rebellion and a bunch more not good stuff.
Y’all took me in and showed me the only thing could penetrate all those walls; human kindness and genuine unconditional Love.
Also, y’all did not accept unacceptable behavior. You didn’t kick me out or abandon me. You said,
”keep coming back”it was constant and baffling to me, and the only thing I did not have a defense against. It broke me.
You see all the acts we do in AA; sweeping floors, making coffee, giving people rides, listening to someone share, greeting people at the door, cleaning the bathroom at the meeting hall, sponsorship, helping people move, cutting people’s grass, late night talks, etc
All of these and much more, are,
Acts of Love.
In AA, we do Love. We don’t talk about it, think about it or preach about it,
We Do it.
I can ask myself “am I doing acts of Love with those who’s space I occupy?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue to do your acts of Love and enjoy the Happiness and contentment those acts bring.
If your answer is no, then write a Gratitude list and do something for someone without them knowing who did it, and see what that experience feels like.
Today I pray that I remember how hard it was for me to get sober, and give others the same compassion and kindness.

[bluidkiti]

January 7

Practice of the Day-
-AA Responsibility Statement:
I am responsible...When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that:
I am Responsible.

-Tom- After I had been working with my sponsor for a week or so, one day he said “tell me what you are Grateful for” I said I had nothing to be grateful for, all I ever cared about in my life is gone. He said, well that’s a problem. I said, I agree. He said well there is always one thing you can be grateful for Tom. I said, oh really, so what is that? He said “ you can always be forever Grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous, because no one else would have your sorry ass”
I wanted to punch him in the face, but I didn’t because it was True.
Before AA, there was only a Living Hell, jails, Institutions and Death if you were an alcoholic/addict. That was it. There was no recovery option.
I often think about, what if there was no one ready and willing to grab my hand when I finally reached out for help? That gives me chills.
My Higher Power and my Willingness to Do AA saved my Life, but I couldn’t have done it without my sponsor, I know that. I asked him one day, “how can I ever repay you for all you have taught me and all you have done for me?” He smiled and said “give to the next man, what I gave to you. That is the only way you can repay me”
If you are attempting to grab the hands that are reaching for help in AA, then you are on track for what was done for you. Continue.
If you are not, I suggest you re read the section above.
Today I pray that I Remember what was Freely Given to me, so that I will do same for another.

[bluidkiti]

January 8

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 75,76
Ch- Into Action
Step 6-
Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have done. We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better. Taking this book down from the shelf we turn to the page which contains the 12 steps. Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we will walk a free man at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly in place? Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar without sand?
If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all—every one? If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing.

-Tom- some steps take a lot of time to do, like 4,9,12. Steps 6 and 7 take one hour and a prayer.
One day in early sobriety (I had been through all the steps and was practicing 10,11,12 about 6 months sober)I sat in an A.A. meeting house writing; identifying and coming up with ways i was going to work on my character defects. For about 2 hours. An old
timer/friend, Pete N, came up and asked me what I was working on. I proudly showed him all my work and my plans. He said wow that’s a lot of work, I smiled and said thank you.
Then he said, “now Tom what I want you to do is throw all that waist of time in the garbage on your way to your truck.
Miss Mary still needs her grass cut, 5th steps need to be received out at the Colony and you need to speak at the prison tonight. Why don’t you try trusting in God, cleaning house and helping others first. Now get out of there and Live sober instead of pretending to be.”
I told him he was such an asshole, slammed the door on my way out, did what he said to do, and learned a lesson of a Lifetime, doing sober actions is what makes me sober.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to thank those that have assisted me in significantly changing my Life.

[bluidkiti]

January 9

Practice of the day-
BB pg 58
Ch- How It Works:
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened and what we are like now.
If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it—then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked. We thought we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.

-Tom- I wanted John H to be my sponsor, so I asked him to be. In turn, he asked me “are you willing to go to any lengths for victory over alcoholism” and “are you willing to do whatever I ask you to do?” He asked me that one evening and of course I immediately said yes because I was really whipped this time. He said, “no, I want you to think about this tonight and give me your answer in the morning, it’s a big decision.”
The 12 steps are a
“all in” deal. It’s the Only way it works, if you desire to stay sober in AA.
It’s just like the card game Texas hold’em: you can ante up, place a few bets, play a bit, but at some point you will have to go “all in”. If you don’t go “all in” you are out of the game.
Sobriety is the same way.
I can ask myself “am I trying to hold on to any of my old ideas?”
If the answer is yes, then work with your sponsor and follow the process of the steps, wherever you are in them. Letting go absolutely is a gift we get by living the steps 1-12.
I pray that today I live a life of rigorous honesty and live in the present.

[bluidkiti]

January 10

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 162-163-
Ch 11- A Vision For You:
Some day we hope that every alcoholic who journeys will find a Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination. To some extent this is already true. Some of us are salesmen and go about. Little clusters of twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities, through contact with our two larger centers. Those of us who travel drop in as often as we can. This practice enables us to lend a hand, at the same time avoiding certain alluring distractions of the road, about which any traveling man can inform you.
Thus we grow. And so can you, though you be but one man with this book in your hand. We believe and hope it contains all you will need to begin.

-Tom- For me, the most Powerful Purpose I can have is to wake up and say to myself, “today I am going to stay sober and help another
alcoholic/addict to achieve sobriety !“
That sets my intention and sober spiritual actions that follow, guarantee it.
It is a design for Living that enables me to be Sober,Happy, Joyous and Free. No matter my current circumstances or location.
I pray that today I Live my primary purpose; stay sober and help another alcoholic/addict to achieve sobriety.

[bluidkiti]

January 11

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 97-
Ch 7-Working With Others:
(More 12th Step Promises)
Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights' sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time of the day or night. Your wife may sometimes say she is neglected. A drunk may smash the furniture in your home, or burn a mattress. You may have to fight with him if he is violent. Sometimes you will have to call a doctor and administer sedatives under his direction. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Occasionally you will have to meet such conditions.

-Tom-When my sponsor and I read this he said that if I am doing what I am supposed to be doing in AA, these Promises will come true like all the others. It’s a package Deal.
We talked a lot about one sentence “Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery.”
He said “do you understand what that means, it means that if you are not helping others you do not have a Foundation in Recovery. If you want a solid Foundation in recovery, then you will help others. It’s your choice and both results are Guaranteed.
Today I pray that I remember that helping others is the Foundation of my recovery and I am Given the Strength to be helpful.

[bluidkiti]

January 12

Practice of the Day-
BB pg-30-
Ch-3- More About Alcoholism:
MOST OF us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.

-Tom- There were a couple of words that I needed to look up the actual definition for;
Delusion- psychotic and unshakable belief in something that is not true.
Concede- admit something is valid or true after first denying or resisting it.
I had the delusion that I could control and enjoy my drinking like non alcoholic people do. My life experiences proved that wasn’t true, for me, where it pertains to drinking.
Not every time I drank did I do terrible things, but every time I did terrible things I had been drinking.
I had to concede to myself that I was an alcoholic which meant that I had a mental obsession, a physical allergy and I was capable of doing anything once alcohol was in my body.
My life experiences proved those facts were true for me.
I pray that today I have the Courage to embrace the Facts about my Life. What is working and what is not.

[bluidkiti]

January 13

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 73-
Ch 6- Into Action:
More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn't deserve it.
The inconsistency is made worse by the things he does on his sprees. Coming to his senses, he is revolted at certain episodes he vaguely remembers. These memories are a nightmare. He trembles to think someone might have observed him. As fast as he can, he pushes these memories far inside himself. He hopes they will never see the light of day. He is under constant fear and tension-that makes for more drinking.

-Tom- before AA, at times when I was not drinking, I was a fairly decent person. Little rough around the edges but not too bad. I presented an image, to the outside world, I thought was pretty good and generally who I wanted to be. I did a lot of good things.
Inside my mind though, it sounded like this “they really wouldn’t love you if they knew you, you really are a piece of **** and don’t deserve anything good, you know this is just a show, you know you are going to screw this all up again, you know this isn’t true.......etc.
Then when I drank...the inside became the outside and all Hell would break loose.
Those 2 paragraphs describe my living Hell that is defined as: untreated Alcoholism.
Thank God we have a treatment for untreated alcoholism. It is called The Program and The Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous.
I pray that today I have the Courage to follow the treatment Programming of the 12 Steps and utilize The Power of The Fellowship, in my life.

[bluidkiti]

January 14

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 154-155-
Ch 11-A Vision For You
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a side table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober for six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was that old, insidious, insanity—that first drink. With a shiver he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.

-Tom- Remember there was no AA in this part of the story. Bill searched the churches for drunks, then helped them. The one he found ended up being Dr Bob.
I remember wanting to stay sober so so bad, and then got drunk. So wanting to didn’t work.
I remember Needing to stay sober for an event, deadline, job or special family occasion, but got drunk. So Needing to stay sober didn’t work.
So wanting and needing to stay sober didn’t keep me sober.
What keeps me sober is DOING the things that sober alcoholics in AA do, no matter how I feel. It was a relief to me to know I didn’t have to feel like doing it or wanting to do it, I just had to do it and as a byproduct, I would stay sober.
Today I pray that I have the Courage to Trust in my God, clean my house and help others.

[bluidkiti]

January 15

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 86-
Ch 6- Into Action:
(Referencing the directions for the 11th Step)
On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from
self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.

-Tom- My sponsor took a lot of time making sure I understood these particular instructions for the morning portion of the 11th step.
-first lesson was when I should do the 11th step- “upon awakening” meaning first thing of every morning. Personally I need a cup of coffee in me before my brain wakes up, then I get after it.
-second lesson- go directly to my God and ask Him to divorce (which means,
Dis-union) my mind from self-pity, dishonesty and self-seeking motives. The most important thing is that I am asking Him to do that for me, I cannot do it myself. Remember at the beginning we established “the main problem of the alcoholic/addict centers in his mind rather than in his body”. I can’t change me, I don’t have the Power, but my Higher Power does. This is not a “self-help” program, it is a “Higher Power reliance” program.
-third lesson- it is not until the 11th step that
AA says “now you can use your brain and start thinking, and this is how we go about thinking”
I would not be able to think clearly and confidently unless I had completed the 10 previous Steps.
I pray that today I put all my efforts in the Solution and pay no attention to the problem.